I've been thinking. Eventhough I sometimes don't really like my dad cause of the way he thinks and does things, I'll always love him and show him that I love him no matter what. Eventhough things can't go my way, I'm blessed to have him as my dad. Love you papa ~ I never realised how much I truly cared for you.

So anyway, today started off a bit badly. There were some conflicts, and I was almost late for assembly. Had Physics test, and wtf it was like so hard like -'- Quiz full marks, Test fail. Nice one Dyana. -_- hais, I hope Ms Phua wont scream at me. Mother tongue was boring, just did some letter writing. I continued to feel down cause my teacher said that it was a waste that I dropped to mt 'b', I should have just continued. All the hard work wasted. Hais, but never mind what's done is done. Just hope that I can pass and overall have a score of < 20. If not, bye bye scholarship. Currently on conditional offer, I really hope I can make it.

Roughly half of the school then went to yishun or somewhere to support the netball girls, c and b division. They played well, no matter what the score, I could see that they tried their very best and so I felt really happy cause my shouting and painful throat really paid off.

I think today's like, really vast contrast compared to yesterday. Yesterday was fun and happy without any worries, but once I'm back in school, I start to feel down again. I guess it's just those particular people who really make me feel sad and hopeless. As for him, Ranen gave me a really good advice so I hope it'll work. Obviously I wont be able to forget cause he hurt me too much, but these kind of things take time I guess.

I haven't been bowling in a while, due to tuition, zz. I really miss training. I need to work on so many things. The last time I trained was I think this tuesday, and I was so demoralised because during the whole 2 hour session, I only managed to excecute 3 good shots. As Coach Jimmy said, I just need to be really patient. Hais, now I really feel stupid. But it's okay cause I'm still going to continue trying.

B & C div victory dinner is tomorrow @ Pizza Hut. Wont be joining them cause I've dental appointment, then tuition afterwards. I was thinking of changing my tuition time but I guess it's not worth it cause I don't want to eat unhealthy food. Come on man, I'm not going to eat fats when next week's napha. Am I being too selfish? I guess. But papa is going to cook for me some damn healthy laksa-pasta with salad, so yup I should just eat at home cause I love my dad.

I'm not going to eat any really unhealthy food already, I'll see how diciplined I am. That stupid mee pok was my last, eventhough it wasn't nice -_- but heck, I'm going to go healthy. No Macs no mee pok no Pizza Hut nothing. I'm going to eat Chasoba and Sushi and Papa's healthy cooking and vegetables and everything. Come on I need to change for the better, I can already see my 4 pacs! I'll try to keep my body and stomach as a motivation to make me eat better. Don't get me wrong though, I'm NOT trying to lose weight, nowhere near there. (I alr think I'm too skinny it's disgusting) I just want to be really healthy like papa and set a good example so that I'll be able to get my future job.

All talk no action means nothing though, so i'll see how it goes!

*Baby dear, I hope you are ok. Remember to give her time and keep your cool k? Shouting wont solve anything. As I've said, the one who manages to keep his cool the longest will eventually be able to take control of the whole situation. I love you, hope everything goes out well for you. I'm always here for you, rain or shine, school or not. Take care.